Poopy Pants

As a young child (well it actually lasted into college) I suffered from an awful "Audreyism" as some of my friends my call it. My problem was getting very excited, which doesn't seem like a problem within itself, but what would happen when I got excited was really the difficulty that was distressing. You see when I would get excited I would pee in my pants! Well a few days ago I met my match in a young boy from Claremont.

Last Tuesday I went with Phakimisa on a field trip to St. Mary's School (an all girls private school). Each year the girls in the school prepare a package for a different child in one of the preschools that Phakimisa supports. So around 10:00 am we loaded thirty children on each taxi (what we might call a 16 seater bus) and made our way to the school. For many of the children involved this was their first time on a taxi and their first time seeing a whole lot of white people. Once we got to the school the staff played with them for a while, then the bell rang and a rush of girls dressed in blue uniforms rushed to greet the children. We all played on the tennis courts for a while and then went to the little party that was set up with biscuits, and tea, and presents. For the three to five year old this venue was really like Christmas, it only happens once a year and is full of gifts and surprises. So each of the children were called by name to come and receive their gift and they all sat with the girls and played with their toys and had biscuits and tea. As we were wrapping the afternoon up the children started to head back to the taxis, but one boy was still waiting in the grass and had the most distressing look on his face. I went to him and asked what was wrong and why he had such a sad face on and got no response. So I helped him stand up and when I did there was a new smell in the air other than freshly cut grass. So I looked on the ground and saw nothing, then I turned my head and saw the child's pant was completely brown. I then saw the need for the sad face. His teacher took notice and came over and took him to the bathroom, where he lost his pants and came to the taxi butt naked. By miracle in his gift he received pants and was able to where those. I inquired why the boy pooped in his pants. I didn't know if he wasn't potty trained or didn't know where to go. The teacher's answer was so simple: "He told me that he just got so excited that he pooped his pants!"

Speaking from experience, I must say it is a bittersweet problem to have. Many times your happiness, most thrilling moments are stained in some way by the mess you make. My heart ached for the boy as I noticed what real vulnerability there is in being excited, even in truly experiencing life. As one whose pride increases with age, as one who tries to keep her emotions under control (and bodily functions these days), and as one who might even exchange truly living for perfection, it was refreshing to be with a boy who simply let it all hang out. It was amazing to see a little boy who let himself experience life so much that he had no control over his body or his actions. Maybe this is the kind of freedom that Christ has set us free for. Not that we are now free to use the bathroom wherever we want but maybe it is this kind of freedom, which lets us truly live, that is the factory of love. I pray that I might experience this freedom of life more and more while I am here. I pray that I might be so wrapped up in life, and the liberating presence of Christ that all I can think to do is to love, and maybe once, just once be so excited that I pee in my pants!